A Letter From Myself at 80


A Letter From Myself at 80, on paper
Where I actually wrote the letter.

If I chose to write a letter from myself at 80 to me at 23, what would I write?

I’m currently making my way through The Artist’s Way, by Julia Cameron. Although I’ve been following it chronologically, I’ve not really been following it week by week. That is to say, even though I’m currently on Week 4 (my reading deprivation is going VERY WELL, thank you!), weeks 1-3 took a collective two months to get through.

Unfortunately, part of the reason for this delay is that 1) I’m following the book alone, not in a group setting, and 2) it takes me a lot of time to get through the tasks she gives each week. I know that I don’t have to do every task, but even choosing a few to do takes a lot of time. At least I’m completing my morning pages every day.

However, one of the types of tasks I have yet to embrace is her “Time Travel” task, where you (you guessed it) “time travel” to a point in your past or future. Often, she asks you to write a letter to yourself.

In The Artist’s Way, Cameron explains that “we often resist what we most need” (4). Quite often, the tasks that make us feel the most resistant and hesitant are those that will help us the most long-term.

So, this week I decided to do one of these tasks that I’ve most resisted. I chose to write a letter from myself at 80.

The Task

In the chapter “Week 4: Recovering a Sense of Integrity,” Cameron sets the usual 10 tasks for us. Task #2 is one that I really did not want to do, but, based on Cameron’s advice, I chose to go ahead and tackle this task.

Cameron writes:

2. Time Travel: Describe yourself at eighty. What did you do after fifty that you enjoyed? Be very specific. Now, write a letter from you at eighty to you at your current age. What would you tell yourself? What interests would you urge yourself to persue? What dreams would you encourage? (89)

I have a lot of problems with time. I think I might even have a phobia about the passage of it. So, prompts like this always make me shy away from them.

But I knew I had to do it if I want to break my creative blocks.

So I wrote a letter from myself at 80.

The Letter

Second page of letter to myself. Fountain pen beside.
My trusty Pilot Metropolitan fountain pen, having just finished writing.

Dear Ryan,

Hold on to your youth. Don’t rush life. I know you. I am you. I regret not taking my time. I remember how I was at your age, looking to what’s ahead. But if you do that, you don’t get to focus on the here and now.

I would spend more time appreciating [my partner]. She’s not going to be around forever.

You’re trying very hard, but you also need to let yourself relax. This movement isn’t healthy.

Take more time to explore. There’s a whole world out there. It will wait for you. 

Play the piano. Read. Get off your damn phone. Very rarely does anything happen that requires your attention immediately.

I know you want to be remembered. But for what purpose? Chasing happiness and self-fulfillment should be your goal, not the validation of others.

Make things that you are proud of. Finish your plays. Don’t let yourself get in your own way. Don’t spend your money on frivolous things.

Care for the people you love. Use your empathy to help the people around you.

See the world. There’s a lot of it to see.

I may have many regrets (and that’s okay), but it is these things that have kept me going, loving, and living the life I wanted to live. Life is the culmination of many things, but it is the friends, family, and experiences we make along the way that makes it all worthwhile.

See you over here,

Ryan Rappaport

Thoughts

I’m amazed how much my dreams came out in this letter. I really am afraid of missing life. I’m afraid of not experiencing the things that I want to.

But to get encouragement from my future self? To tell myself, on a subconscious level, perhaps, that I need to slow down and take my time? I don’t know. It’s endearing, I think.

I’m happy with how this turned out. I definitely will be doing more of these time-traveling tasks. I probably will also go back to earlier chapters to tackle the tasks that I chose not to pursue.

I am enjoying my time with The Artist’s Way. I’m becoming more confident in the things I want to do and am exploring different facets of my creativity.

Maybe I’ll post more about my experience with this book? …More on this later.


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